Jim: "What is that Dwight?"
Dwight: "It's a recorder"
Jim: "Why is it here?"
Dwight: "To record"
Jim: "But why is it here in the conference room?"
Dwight:"Since Michael is gone on vacation I want him to get a transcript our meetings."
Jim : Oh my god, Dwight, what are you doing?
Dwight : What?
Jim : You’re not allowed to take off your pants in the middle of the office.
Dwight : I’m not…
Jim : Dwight, you know what? Just back off, okay. It’s making me uncomfortable. This is sexual harassment, by the way. Oh my god. He’s got a knife!
Dwight : I do not have a knife.
Jim : No, let the record show that Dwight K. Schrute is now completely nude and is holding a plastic knife to Stanley’s neck.
Dwight : Let the record show that Jim Halpert is a liar!
Jim : [grabs recorder] Dwight Schrute is now wearing a baby’s bonnet
Dwight : [grabs it back] I am not!
Phyllis : Oh, Jim Carrey just walked in! Dwight, get his autograph for Michael, quickly!
Dwight : Jim Carrey did not just walk in. Okay?
Karen : Dwight, what is that on your stomach? Is that a Muppet Babies tattoo?
Jim : Oh my god, Karen, you’re right. That is Animal from the Muppet Babies.
Dwight : You can’t see my stomach…
[everyone is laughing]
Andy : I am now chopping off Phyllis’ head with a chainsaw!
[laughing stops]
Andy: hehehe RINGNINGNGNG